Monday, September 04, 2006
I Really Don't Know What to Think
I really don't know if I like others parents or not.
First we had the birthday party fiasco. The one where I was told to bring candy bars instead of treat bags for the kids (trust there was a laundry list of reasons for this from other mother) then the mother tells me that we can't pass out the candy bars because we didn't know who had allergies and it was okay because she and her husband brought treat bags. Bitch!
Now, we have the Girl Scouts issue. I got a call last night from one of the other mothers in the troop. She was calling to see if during the phone conversation I had with the head lady something was mentioned about her being the leader instead of me. I didn't lie and said yes. I was told that she wanted to be leader and that if it was okay with me and I really didn't want to do it, she would be leader. Well, during our phone conversation she said that it was a miss communication and that she didn't need to be leader, but since the head lady knew her the head lady wanted her to be leader. So, do I want to be leader because she's willing to do it; or she can co-leader; or just help; or we can lead together because it doesn't matter whose name comes first does it?
What the hell????? I must seriously have a personality flaw because no, I was not originally going to be leader, but when no one else volunteered I took it. Yes, this other woman was at the same meeting and wouldn't even commit to an evening, much less being a leader. Well I have this problem where once I take hold of something, I run with it. I've already started planning crafts and events; I've totally embraced this and now someone else wants to do it. I was talking to Jason and stated as plainly as I could this is my current response:
1/4 of me says to just let her be leader and maybe I'll lead a troop next year.
1/4 of me says doing it jointly will be fine. The more help the better right?
The other 1/2 of me says "Step off bitch you didn't claim it that night and now it's mine. No touching my toys, I don't share well."
All Jason said was that this other mother and I needed to remember this is for the girls. It's not about us and the decision should be placed where it will be best for the girls. Yes, I knew this but I don't know what would be best. I think if I were leader it would be fine, if she were leader it would be fine, and if we were co-leaders it would be fine.
Personality flaw:
I'm just upset that it's happening. I embraced the position I accepted and I don't like people coming in trying to throw a wrench in it.
What do I do? What do I do?
I think I will allow her to be leader and maybe get my own troop next year. I can still participate at the meetings and go on the field trips. I just know myself too well to know that I have control issues. I don't like working on things like this with others because it just gets way too confusing. Something gets mis-communicated not communicated at all and there are problems. One person has this idea in mind for the direction of the troop and the other person thinks something else and there are problems. This isn't my last shot at it and if I step back and look at everything else going on in my life, it's probably best for the girls. Jason may be gone again, although it's looking unlikely, I have two other children to care for, I work fulltime, etc. What's best for the girls right? I just have to remember what's best for the girls and I really don't want to risk anymore hurt feelings this year, whether they are mine or someone else's. There's a reason that these things are organized with just one leader and that's to avoid problems.
Okay, I must go shed a tear or two now.
First we had the birthday party fiasco. The one where I was told to bring candy bars instead of treat bags for the kids (trust there was a laundry list of reasons for this from other mother) then the mother tells me that we can't pass out the candy bars because we didn't know who had allergies and it was okay because she and her husband brought treat bags. Bitch!
Now, we have the Girl Scouts issue. I got a call last night from one of the other mothers in the troop. She was calling to see if during the phone conversation I had with the head lady something was mentioned about her being the leader instead of me. I didn't lie and said yes. I was told that she wanted to be leader and that if it was okay with me and I really didn't want to do it, she would be leader. Well, during our phone conversation she said that it was a miss communication and that she didn't need to be leader, but since the head lady knew her the head lady wanted her to be leader. So, do I want to be leader because she's willing to do it; or she can co-leader; or just help; or we can lead together because it doesn't matter whose name comes first does it?
What the hell????? I must seriously have a personality flaw because no, I was not originally going to be leader, but when no one else volunteered I took it. Yes, this other woman was at the same meeting and wouldn't even commit to an evening, much less being a leader. Well I have this problem where once I take hold of something, I run with it. I've already started planning crafts and events; I've totally embraced this and now someone else wants to do it. I was talking to Jason and stated as plainly as I could this is my current response:
1/4 of me says to just let her be leader and maybe I'll lead a troop next year.
1/4 of me says doing it jointly will be fine. The more help the better right?
The other 1/2 of me says "Step off bitch you didn't claim it that night and now it's mine. No touching my toys, I don't share well."
All Jason said was that this other mother and I needed to remember this is for the girls. It's not about us and the decision should be placed where it will be best for the girls. Yes, I knew this but I don't know what would be best. I think if I were leader it would be fine, if she were leader it would be fine, and if we were co-leaders it would be fine.
Personality flaw:
I'm just upset that it's happening. I embraced the position I accepted and I don't like people coming in trying to throw a wrench in it.
What do I do? What do I do?
I think I will allow her to be leader and maybe get my own troop next year. I can still participate at the meetings and go on the field trips. I just know myself too well to know that I have control issues. I don't like working on things like this with others because it just gets way too confusing. Something gets mis-communicated not communicated at all and there are problems. One person has this idea in mind for the direction of the troop and the other person thinks something else and there are problems. This isn't my last shot at it and if I step back and look at everything else going on in my life, it's probably best for the girls. Jason may be gone again, although it's looking unlikely, I have two other children to care for, I work fulltime, etc. What's best for the girls right? I just have to remember what's best for the girls and I really don't want to risk anymore hurt feelings this year, whether they are mine or someone else's. There's a reason that these things are organized with just one leader and that's to avoid problems.
Okay, I must go shed a tear or two now.
